Sunday, October 26, 2014

Baby 4 Week 32: Body Hair Philosophy

Week 32

This has been a busy week. We gutted our bathroom... down to the studs gutted... and we are preparing for our road trip to Texas and then Disneyland. But I promised you a pubic hair post and I'm going to deliver!

Quick update on baby and the baby house. Baby is a crazy active little thing. It always surprises me that Eric doesn't like to feel his pre-born baby kick. It creeps him out. I still like to scoot my belly up to him and let baby attack. 

My uterus is contracting a lot now. I think Eric is sick of me saying "my uterus is so hard!! Feel my uterus, no FEEL it! Isn't is SO hard..." I think he should be more impressed... it seriously does get so hard. I'm also leaking a little colostrum, I think this is the first time this has happened. I just think my body is super impressive... have I mentioned how hard my uterus gets? I might ask you to feel it.

I've had some really painful round ligament feels... like I've wondered twice if I should call my midwife it hurt so bad... but is stops. Mysterious pregnancy things.

Ok so this hair post. There are lots of subjects that I have been able to form very clear opinions on. Sometimes I'm ok with saying that I don't know enough to form an opinion, or that I don't feel I need to form an opinion. Sometimes there is a subject that I just can't seem to form an opinion on though I would like to. I can apply evidence, philosophy, personal feelings... and still come up empty. Body hair is one of those things... and yeah, it bothers me that I don't currently have a clear body hair philosophy.

I think I just made myself the weirdest person you know.

A couple years ago someone shared this Vagenda article, Hair! (Not the Musical). It's one of my favorite articles that I've ever read. Stop everything now and read it.

I'll wait...

She's great right? So that article really got me thinking. Before that article my hair philosophy was simple... no hair = good/clean/normal... and for me... hair of any kind only happened when I was lazy... which honestly was most of the time... but my feelings were that it wasn't ok. Obviously leg and under arm shaving is a normal part of our culture, but I also shave my arms, stomach, and had any hair on my face/eyebrows lasered years ago. Have I imprisoned myself with my expectations of hairlessness? This article definitely got me thinking, but didn't change anything for me... I just didn't know what to do with the information...

I don't know how much thought women give pubic hair when they are going to give birth. Is whether you shave, clip, or go natural an obvious decision? Do women reconsider their hair style for their birth? I don't think this is something that I have ever given much thought in the past... really... like legs and pits... in every context no hair = good. I'm not sure where I got this feeling, How did I decide how naked women should look? Were there Cosmo articles on this? No hair is normal in porn of course... maybe that was it. Either way, like the Vagenda article, a share on facebook some time ago got me thinking about hair again.

Warning... contains nudity... and hair...

This website is called Mormon Woman Bare. A friend shared it and I don't know why... but the feeling of hair being normal and no hair not being normal was intense. I really wanted to share it, but didn't... for reasons that are a whole other blog post that may or may not ever be written. But I think of those pictures often. I liked the project, and I think it's very... very important for women to see what other normal women look like naked. Most importantly... for this topic at least, they really made me question what I do with my body. What I feel is normal.

And I'm undecided.

Maybe if I was a certain kind of feminist this would be an easy decision. All women are expected to shave? Fuck that. Hair it is! But for me, feminism means choice... in every direction. I actually very much love that I have women in my life who shave their legs, but not under their arms. And I know women who don't shave their legs, but do shave under their arms. To me that says they are likely making a decision based on their personal preference. If someone doesn't shave anything, that's cool too. And I think if someone prefers to shave everything... also very cool. But seriously... what do I prefer???

I seriously... don't know... and for some reason birthing soon makes me think about this more. Probably because there is a high likelihood of there being pictures and video of me naked, and I want to like what I see... are you all just like omg what am I reading??? I'm sorry... but 6 years ago I promised to lay it all out in these posts... and I'm thinking about it a lot.

That's it... really... I have no fucking idea what to do. I know that my philosophy for women everywhere is do what you want, what makes you feel good about your body. For me... I have no idea what that means, and that bothers me. Not a lot... but enough to write about it for 2 hours.

This week I have a massage, a doula interview, and it's Milo's 5th birthday! Oh! Eric and I had our first birth class last week! I didn't even write about that... guess I'll have to share about that next week.

What this week was like with my other pregnancies:
             Milo, Week 32: Those God Damn Crazy EC Moms Are Kinda Making Sense!
             Ash, Week 32: Gateway Drug
             Indy,  Week 32: Let's Just Keep Doing This

1 comment:

  1. Great post! Feminism is definitely about women having choice. The sad truth is that liberated and independent as we may be, our choices are often shaped by the patriarchal society we've been raised in. I do a lot of body hair removal, bleaching and maintenance. I tell myself it's just a preference but I'm sure that has everything to do with the messaging we get all around us.