Sunday, October 15, 2006

Chinese Food:2 Cori:1

So we all know what a bulimic is, right? it is someone who "intentionally" eats a bunch of food, or "binges," then pukes it up, "purges," in order to prevent weight gain. Well friends, I'm finally ready to admit that I am a Chinese food bulimic. Out of the last three times I've eaten Chinese food (not including right now, as I'm eating chow mien and orange chicken as I write this and am yet to know how this episode will turn out), I have thrown it up twice. So, if I "intentionally" "binge" on something that has a 2 out of 3 chance of making me "purge," does that not make me bulimic? Now most people would say, "But Cori, put the freaking chopsticks down and walk away from the beef and broccoli and everything will be fine." Yes but this is apart of the disease, I can't stop... and do I really want to?

Remember back in the day when pregnancy was considered a disease, we're talking like a couple hundred years ago, but now it's embraced as totally natural and wonderful. Well maybe this is only a disease today, maybe I am in fact more highly evolved and have devolved a mechanism that helps me to automatically reject unhealthy food. I, unlike you, will be able to enjoy this meal right now worry free, knowing I will be safely hurling my guts out later.

Friends, family, and highly important scientists, we are ready do add another rung to the evolutionary latter, and it's me...

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