Monday, April 3, 2006

Japanese Buffet Kicked my Ass

When Dallas and I left Sakura Buffet it was not a triumphant exit with "we are the champions" blasting... it was more a scurrying away of a beaten dog with its tail tucked under. The Sakura Buffet had kicked my ass, and I was shamed...

I really believed I could roll with the big dogs. $9.99 of all you can eat everything... I was hungry and rebellious... so I went for it, young naive as i was. See the thing about buffets is that you have to try to eat at least $9.99 worth of food or they win, preferably more. How hard can that be, right? Well not even one plate in (like a little fruit, veggies, and noodles) I was done. I was looking around... people were going back and forth with huge towering plates-shrimp, chicken, noodles, rice, doughnuts, crabs, cake, french fries, everything-then going back! I was a wuss... ashamed... scared... so I went back. I got asparagus, noodles and chicken, and a fried bread thing. I felt confident, then a wavered, and failed... I could do the asparagus and some noodles then it was like the slow motion falling of a soldier... my fork fell. I think in the end I ate about six dollars worth of food. As I watched a woman who had been eating when we arrived go back for the third plate that I had seen... I decided it.

Buffets are not for people like you and me. They are for trained professionals that can eat a shit load of food and therefore get their money's worth, and even beat the system by eating twenty bucks worth of rice. People like us should just stay home. Damn buffets.

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